Time After Time

I have thought of nothing but my mother and father all morning, from the time at six in the morning, when my alarm rang…through my blogging efforts to distract…into the second cup of coffee and then onto the fields of the off leash park.  The sun is shining here and the dry grass carries old smells of winter.  Listening to CKUA on the way home in the van, this duet played and there began the howling…the gut-crying and all spilled out.  After what my beautiful sister has written, “He has given all he can to care for his “Katy” at home, and is to be commended for his herculean efforts.”


After all of this…we, as a family, are growing more and more to accept that Mom’s Alzheimer’s disease is bit by bit, claiming her…and we are grieving and frustrated and sad.  If I was watching my best friend being sucked into an abyss of quicksand, I would feel the same.  It is an impossible thing to see parts of your mother, father, husband, wife and friend disappear over time.  It is something impossible to fully grasp unless you are standing beside that dark hole, watching.


Readers, you fill your lives with art and music, writing and travel, friendships and celebrations.  The world is filled up to the brim with everything that is lovely.  I only wish to say and I know I say it often…appreciate that loveliness, family, friendships, faith to the limits.  Today is ours.  This moment is ours.  It is all we have.  As I listened to this song…I thought of my mother.


“After my picture fades and darkness has
Turned to gray
Watching through windows you’re wondering
If I’m OK
Secrets stolen from deep inside
The drum beats out of time.”

1 thought on “Time After Time

Leave a Reply