It’s been consistently cold this past week…as low as -22 degrees. My Lawrence attends to his bathrooming in two separate visits as it’s just too cold for his arthritic joints. (I think this healing joint of mine must be picking up on the same as it is neither bending or straightening as it might.)
This morning at 5, he couldn’t make it back downstairs after his drink, so I came upstairs and rested on his front-window mat with him. I cuddled him and spoke to him quietly and then I had a little tear. His body just collapses now, sometimes when he’s standing and he has troubles with the stairs. It’s always easier now to remain on one floor. I wonder what I am going to do over time. This is my dearest friend.
So…it is frigid outside. The street where I live looks like a smaller version of Vegas…lights, blinking colour and sound effects! I retrieved a single strand of lights from the studio and wiggled it through the branches of my front yard shrub, this before serving a roast beef dinner up for some friends. Advent begins and my heart lights up with love for my life and the hope of healing.
As I was taking the string of lights down off of my wall in the studio, I stumbled and my foot…sock and sandle landed five inches in a bucket of water I use as a sink. Sheesh! I squished back into the house through the freezy snow, with water mushing off my pantleg. I managed to protect my hand in the fall…this was my greatest relief. I’m a bit of a stumble bum in my body lately…as well as in my memory…I’m not feeling spritely.
Sometimes people get a false sense from my writing here…that I’m an optimistic person with a very positive disposition. In real time, I’m in the midst of a constant struggle lately. I’m in 4th gear with a heavy load behind me and I’m fighting with all that is in me to stay on the road. I’m most burdened by the traditions of Christmas at this time…trying to find ways to simplify my expectations of self where everything is concerned. It is more important to find a place of good cheer in my spirit, more than anything else. My children would like me to be happy.
Good news…a marine photographer for the National Geographic, Brian Skerry, has written me a couple of e mails and is supportive of me using his photographs as references for my beluga whale series. He took a quick peek at my work here on the blog and sent me compliments and good wishes. This is all so good and I’m holding on to such good bits…close to my heart good bits!
My friend, Bill Webb has enjoyed a very successful art opening/exhibit in Edmonton also…so this is another good piece of news.
And finally, this morning I am taking two of my art classes to visit the Emily Carr exhibit at the Glenbow Art Gallery!! Yippee! I will write some news about that at my next sitting here. I miss writing here.
I finished the book, Pillars of the Earth over a week ago…it’s something I want you ALL to read!! Speaking of good words to read….here are some that my friend wrote to me…I treasure them….
It’s 11:30 here and the wind is so strong that these old windows just shake. It is raining hard outside and each drop hits the glass. I love to fall asleep when it rains at night.. Someone left a light on in the church across the street today.(it doesn’t happen very often) The stained glass window shines in my eyes when I lay down in bed. I think of it as a sign…maybe?? The different colours must have a meaning….